Boil water to prepare noodles. Cook according to package instructions, but make sure you time them to be done so they can be added to the sautéing tofu and stems without delay! (Also, feel free to up the amount of noodles for a bigger meal. It was late, and I knew I wasn't going to eat it with a broth, so I kept the noodles to a minimum.)
Drain (if necessary, and press, if you like) the tofu. Slice it up any way you like; cubes get boring, so I like to chop it up at all sorts of funky angles. In a skillet, heat cooking oil over medium-high heat. Add tofu and sear as much as you desire, adding the hot pepper/chili oil after a couple of minutes. It may be helpful to cover with a lid, if the water still in your tofu gets all splattery with the hot oil! (I used half a typical packaged tub of tofu. Obviously, it's easy to use the whole thing and double the other amounts in the recipe to make leftovers or feed multiple mouths at the same meal!)
My stems were already blanched due to previous kitchen shenanigans...but assuming yours aren't, you can take care of this while the tofu is crisping up: In a small saucepan/pot bring just a cup or so of water to a boil. Once boiling, drop the stems in. Once they start to turn a brighter green, they're done. Dump the greens and water into a colander (over the sink, of course!) and splash them with some cold water to stop the cooking of the stems.
About 30 seconds before you think the tofu will be done, add the stems. Stir and sauté the tofu and stems, adding the black pepper at this point (and the red pepper flakes, if you didn't use the spicy oil earlier). Once that's had 30-60 seconds to combine, add the rice noodles. Stir and heat together, until thoroughly mixed and heated.
Serve on its own, in a broth, or accompanied with other stir-fried vegetables....say, oh I don't know, maybe some leafy greens??!! Enjoy!
This is a zero-waste meal as you can use all parts of your greens!